Thankful

Ok, So I am a total slacker. I feel so horrible that I can not find the time to update this thing. Maybe that's why I haven't scrapbooked in a year. I give full props to my friend, Jen, who blogs almost every day (sometimes twice). I can usually get in a few a month but not this month. And the only reason I have a moment for this is because I have 9 little ones (including my 2) sleeping in a fort in the middle of my living room and it is going on midnight. You see, I don't like to shop. For those of you that aren't aware... I get huge anxiety over the idea of spending money when we are so far in debt. I would rather make it than spend it. I know, every guy's dream. So I put out an offer with my daycare parents that whoever needed me to watch kids on Friday, I would be available. Some of my parents work in retail and had to be in VERY early. So we just decided to do a sleepover. And they are doing awesome.

Today is Thanksgiving. And honestly today was a real emotional day for me. I am so thankful for my husband and my girls. I have the best family in the world who is so supportive. And I have a bunch of friends that I love to laugh with.

So why am I having such a hard day? It's not only the first Thanksgiving without Grandma.

Christmas is right around the corner and I won't have her sitting at my table giving me my jar of strawberry jelly. It's the fact that even though we invited her best friend of almost 40 years, he didn't show up and I felt like having him here was going to be the one thing that helped me get through the day. He has been by her side for every birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas. We are his only family and I don't (CAN'T) lose him too.

And I think about Pops. How much he is missing out on. Or actually how much my girls are missing out on. Will our constant talk of him help them to sustain a memory of how wonderful their PaPaw was?

In the middle of my self pitty party, I have been reading my bible quite a bit. And even though I am sad, I feel blessed, if that makes any sense.

I am Thankful for those that have touched my life every second. Every person affects who we are and who we have become. And I am happy with my life really. I just miss those that are not with us anymore.

I am Thankful for my loving husband, whose arms I feel warmth and comfort in. Who's laugh I long to hear and smile that makes me feel better. And his creative way of fixing things???

I am Thankful for my humor. Or at least my husband's for listening to my crazy comments and laughing his butt off at me. (He got another good one for the book he is going write on my blondness comments tonight) Save it for another post. :)

I am Thankful for my beautiful daughters, who I live, breath, and hold my head up high for every day.

I am Thankful for my parents, siblings, grandparents. Every minute spent together is a blessing.

I am Thankful in Christ.

My crazy Meagan with her peace sign, Aunt Jessica, Uncle Geoff, and Katelyn. And Jessica, you do have a great smile!

Granny and JT, with Katelyn and Meagan.

Me with all my girls. My mom, Me, and Jess. Katelyn and Meagan.
Katelyn on Aunt Charity with Meagan in front.

I REALLY love this photo of these two. Happy Thanksgiving!

Somehow going through the photos of tonight has helped me feel better. Thank you for letting me feel however I want to feel.

May God Bless everyone with the upcoming holidays.